Have you ever felt like the odd man out? The third wheel? A square peg in a round hole?
I am convinced that every one of us, at our core level, has a desire to fit in and connect with like-minded souls. Our tribe, our clan, our posse, our ohana, our people. Those that ‘get’ us. Those who understand our journey because it mirrors their own.
And more often than not, we come up short. We try to find social groups we can connect with only to still land on the outside looking in… yet again.
Or, we try to change in order to fit in more readily. Whether it be our appearance, our clothes or our values. It could be for a book club, a social group, a gang or yes, even a church.
The desire to belong usually trumps common sense or can pit you against your own sense of self.
We will do things against our better judgement to be more widely acceptable. Which could mean anything from doing drugs to voting a certain way because your desired people group is leaning in that direction… even if you are not.
We are social creatures looking to belong.
It is no wonder that peer pressure at all levels and all ages can be so rampant and vapid at the same time.
I have a core desire to fit in, too. But I have reached a stage in my life that I will no longer compromise my basic, personal tenets just to belong.
I will continue searching for my tribe- they are out there, and when I find them, I will know. They will accept me without expecting me to change. I can be myself and not a watered down version of who they want me to be. I will speak my truth, and they will not cringe. I will be me, I will belong, and then I will know, I am home.