I love stories.
I love reading them.
I love writing them.
I love telling them.
We are all made up of stories. Stories we live out, share and believe in.
The best ones are enjoyed and retold.
The bad ones are buried.
Sometimes, the line between fiction and reality gets blurred leaving us with horror stories we believe to be true, but they are only a hack job in disguise. These stories get embedded into our psyche, taking root as they burrow deeper into the fertile fields of our soul. Like insidious weeds, they intertwine with our central cortex, strangling our courage, our innate talents, our creativity, our spirit and our drive.
Here are some works of fiction I was raised believing in that has affected the trajectory of my life.
~ You can’t do that, you’re a girl.
~ Only rich kids go to college.
~ You will never do better than that.
~ (someone once told my kids…) ‘Your parents could own a home and have nice things too, if they stopped wasting their money.’
~ You need to have more faith
~ Money doesn’t grow on trees.
~ Try being more grateful
The problem with belief systems is that they usually belong to someone else, imparted onto impressionable young minds, ingrained into the consciousness of a culture.
Just because everyone believe it, does not make it right…or true.
Our beliefs are handed down to us part and parcel whether they make sense or not, and in ignorance, we perpetuate the cycle.
It is easy to say; challenge your beliefs, get a new story, break the cycle...but how do you know what beliefs need to be challenged, changed or broken when they have been carefully woven into your being? Where do you start the untangling?
I don’t have the answers but I keep searching.
I am starting by looking at the things that aren’t working in my life.
Front and center, once again, are my finances.
I must ask myself, Why aren’t they working?
Answering this means taking a good, hard look at how they came to be this way and then an even deeper look into the underlying causes that allowed it in the first place.
And this is but one of my issues!
Here are a few more of mine, and some from friends, so I know that I am not alone when I say there is much to work on.
~Hypochondria ~Low self-esteem ~Perpetually late ~The need to correct others ~Always interrupting ~Overeating ~Emotionally distant ~Never satisfied ~Perfectionism ~ A sense of neediness ~Overly critical
(what keeps cropping up again and again in your life?)
On the surface, they may seem like minor infractions, but delve a bit deeper and there can usually be found an underlying cause that gave rise to these issues in the first place.
In my previous life as a dental assistant, people would often come in with a toothache wanting only something for the pain. Try explaining that unless they get to the root of the problem, using only pain killers is like putting a band-aid on a gushing wound. It is only a temporary fix, a stop-gap, until the actual problem is resolved.
I am convinced our internal problems are the same way. Do some mental work, figure where and when these problems began. Face the fear. It is uncomfortable but once it is uncovered, the unweaving can begin. True healing begins from the inside.
As you watch me flounder through my journey, maybe it will encourage you to question what is not working in your life and if there a reason this is happening. What stories have you been telling yourself? Maybe it’s time to start a new book.
I wish you Peace and Light and the Words to write your new story.